Amare Stoudemire is Arthur Spooner

What?

Yep, you heard me right. Amare Stoudemire is to me what Arthur Spooner was to Doug Heffernen.

He’s annoying and irritating at times, he thinks he’s probably better than he is, he’s a bit senile, doesn’t quite do what you want him to do, and seemingly will be around forever.

But, dammit I like the man. And I’m not afraid to admit it.

Amare is absolutely like Arthur (Jerry Stiller) - stubborn, won’t do what you want, and always thinks he’s right. But after years of trying to find reasons to dismiss him and making excuses for disliking his attitude, I continually find it exceptionally hard not to like him; just as Doug (Kevin James) did in the fantastic TV sitcom ‘King of Queens’.

I don’t know what it is about Amare that won’t allow me to completely write him off or allow me to stay mad at the guy. However, I’ve come to accept that, apparently, I’ve somehow become an apologist for him.

Maybe I just feel sorry for him not fulfilling an inhuman amount of expectations. Maybe it’s that he’ll do something so nice, so amazing, and so heartfelt at a time you don’t expect it (like his trip to Sierra Leone) that keeps you hanging on. Or that he had to lie face down for 20 hours for multiple days to continue his retinal healing process. Maybe it’s that we’d truly miss him if he were gone, and we’ve undoubtedly take him for granted while he’s still here.

I don’t know. But, I like the guy.

That’s why I’ll forgive his comments about he and Channing Frye boxing out so the guards can get rebounds. Or that the screens he sets for Steve ultimately allow Nash to go for 30 points any given game. Or that he isn’t a captain so pertinent questions about the state of the team shouldn’t be answered by him.

Hell, maybe he’s right.

But I recant all my statements about being frustrated with Amare. Every single time I ever get mad or wish he would go away, I feel incredibly guilty; almost as if I just shot a puppy who accidentally bit me.

I give up. I love Amare Stoudemire. And I hereby forgive all future mistakes and mishaps he makes.

After all, I know that no matter how frustrated he makes me, I’ll miss him when he’s gone.

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